How the koolpaw villa was Tempered

Or How to find a tornado kitten

Archive for December, 2008

HOW-TO KIT FOR WRITING THE BLUES

Posted by koolpaw on December 30, 2008

robertjohnson

1. Most Blues begin, “Woke up this morning.”

2. “I got a good woman,” is a bad way to begin the Blues, ‘less you stick something nasty in the next line, like “I got a good woman with the meanest face in town.”

3. The Blues is simple. After you get the first line right, repeat it.Then find something that rhymes …sort of: “Got a good woman…with the meanest face in town. Got teeth like Margaret Thatcher and she weigh 500 pound.”

4. The Blues are not about choice. You stuck in a ditch: you stuck in a ditch, ain’t no way out.

5. Blues cars: Chevys and Cadillacs and broken down trucks. Blues don’t travel in Volvos, BMWs, or Sport Utility Vehicles. Most Blues transportation is a Greyhound bus or a southbound train. Jet aircraft and state-sponsored motor pools ain’t even in the running. Walkin’ plays a major part in the blues lifestyle. So does fixin’ to die.

6. Teenagers can’t sing the Blues. They ain’t fixin’ to die yet. Adults sing the Blues. In Blues, “adulthood” means being old enough to get the electric chair if you shot a man in Memphis.

7. Blues can take place in New York City, but not in Hawaii or anyplace in Canada. Hard times in St. Paul or Tucson is just depression. Chicago, St Louis, and Kansas City are still the best places to have the Blues. You cannot have the blues in any place that don’t get rain.

8. A man with male pattern baldness ain’t the blues. A woman with male pattern baldness is. Breaking your leg cuz you skiing isn’t the blues..Breaking your leg cuz a’alligator be chompin’ on it is.

9. You can’t have no Blues in an office or a shopping mall. The lighting is wrong. Go outside to the parking lot or sit by the dumpster.

10. Good places for the Blues:

a. highway
b. jailhouse
c. empty bed
d. bottom of a whiskey glass

Bad places for the Blues:

a. ashrams
b. gallery openings
c. Ivy League institutions
d. golf courses

11. No one will believe it’s the Blues if you wear a suit, ‘less you happen to be a’ old black man, and you slept in it.

12. Do you have the right to sing the Blues?

Yes, if:

a. you’re older than dirt
b. you’re blind
c. you shot a man in Memphis
d. you can’t be satisfied.

No, if:

a. you have all your teeth
b. you were once blind but now can see
c. the man in Memphis lived.
d. you have a retirement plan or trust fund.

13. Blues is not a matter of color. It’s a matter of bad luck. Tiger Woods cannot sing the blues. Gary Coleman could. Ugly white people also got a leg up on the blues.

14. If you ask for water and Baby give you gasoline, it’s the Blues.
Other acceptable Blues beverages are:

a. wine
b. whiskey or bourbon
c. muddy water
d. black coffee.

The following are NOT Blues beverages:

a. mixed drinks
b. kosher wine
c. Snapple
d. sparkling water
e. double, decaf, lowfat latte

15. If it occurs in a cheap motel or a shotgun shack, it’s a Blues death. Stabbed in the back by a jealous lover is another Blues way to die. So is the electric chair, substance abuse, and dying lonely on a broken down cot.You can’t have a Blues death if you die during a tennis match or getting liposuction.

16. Some Blues names for women:

a. Sadie
b. Big Mama
c. Bessie
d. Fat River Dumpling

17. Some Blues names for men:

a. Joe
b. Willi e
c. Little Willie
d. Big Willie

18. Persons with names like Sierra, Sequoia, and Rainbow can’t sing the Blues no matter how many men they shoot in Memphis.

19. Make yer own Blues name (starter kit):

a. name of physical infirmity (Blind, Cripple, Lame, etc.)
b. first name (see above) plus name of fruit (Lemon, Lime, Kiwi, etc)
c. last name of U.S. President (Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, etc.)

For example, Blind Lime Jefferson, or Cripple Kiwi Fillmore, etc.

20. I don’t care how tragic your life is: you own a computer, you cannot sing the blues. You best destroy it — with fire, a spilled bottle of Mad Dog, or get out a shotgun. Maybe your big woman just done sat on it. I don’t care.

(the Original is unknown, who cares?)

Advertisements

Posted in MUSIC | Tagged: , | Leave a Comment »

Grappling World Championships 2008

Posted by koolpaw on December 24, 2008

lisaward

 

She is not a beautiful rhythmic gymnist nor an instructor of Aerobic dance.  Lisa Ward won a double title: NO-Gi division and Gi division in  the  FILA Grappling World Championships 2008.  And Pro MMA fighter who is the champ of FFF.

  !!!!

http://www.d4-world.com/
U.S. wins No-Gi team title at Grappling World Championships
U.S. edges France for Gi team title at Grappling Worlds in Switzerland

Molly won Silver. Tate also won Silver.

in other results, i found a familiar name at 92kg divison.  Ian Murphy who fought Jacare in Japan won Silver in No-Gi, Gold in Gi.

In the finals, he defeated a talented competitor with a strong background in Gi jiu jitsu, Pierre Pilat of France, 2-1. It was the first time that Murphy had competed in a Gi Grappling competition.

First time??  Thats impressive winning. Congrats  !!

The former Champ of bodogFIGHT 135lbs, Tara LaRosa… won Silver in Gi division. Gi? Silver? . uh oh, time for the eggs of fish party?

Which she wants to try?

 Ikura?
ikura

Sujiko?
sujikoKazunoko?
420_kazunoko_b

oh Tarako?
tarako1

Seems Hot peppered Tarako=Mentaiko is the best?
mentaiko-kire-hasi60

 

yumm yumm fish eggs

tara

 

daaamn Roxy alrady went back to the states for holidays. Anyways, Even The Queen of MMA, Tara cant  always win.  Those are different sports .

The Double crown Lisa Ward is the one of the most toughest ladies at 48kg/105.5 lbs in the world without doubt.

 

 

Posted in MMA | Leave a Comment »

He did it AGAIN

Posted by koolpaw on December 20, 2008

01title

 

n1

Familiar place with familiar face?

n2

n3

n4

n5

 

e382afe383aae38383e38397e3839ce383bce3838901

But Who can blame Ken-flo?

Posted in MMA | Tagged: | Leave a Comment »